Thoughts on being pregnant

Some people have asked me what it is like being pregnant. I have been envious of friends that were pregnant and wondered if my day would ever come. Almost seven months in I think I have come to the conclusion that it is a wonderful and strange experience. Wonderful as I think about this small life growing inside of me and the miracle of life. Strange as my body is taken over by hormones and another person that insists on kicking and punching at any hour of the day, sometimes taking me by surprise. The dreams I have been having are wild. Most of them I don’t remember for long other than to think, “that was straaange” as I wander to the bathroom for the umpteenth time that night. My least favourite dream that I do remember is one in which my brother was diagnosed with cancer. And my favourite is one in which I discovered two foot bridges leading away from my house in Mexico: one to Hawaii and the other to Grand Beach, Manitoba.

At six and a half months people are often surprised to discover that a. I am pregnant or b. that that I am thirty weeks along. My pre-existing size has hidden some of the baby and I have not gained as much weight/size as many women do by now. I confess that I crave a cute preggo belly but am coming to realize that this may never happen. I now understand how some people can hide their pregnancy for most of the time or not know they are pregnant and just think that they were gaining weight. Though the movements in my abdomen and many other symptoms would have me wondering what was going on if I didn’t know already I felt so different these past months.

I won’t get into all the symptoms I have been experiencing because that is way too much information that you do not need to know. My biggest issue right now is some serious nerve pain in my thighs that prevents me from doing as much as I would like to do. But overall I have been feeling well. I kept waiting for the burst of energy some people had talked about in the second trimester, but it never came. That or it was canceled out by the hottest, longest summer they’ve had in this area in years. I am starting to feel more and more pregnant as I try to move about my daily routine and need to sit or lay down regularly to relieve the pressure on the pinched nerve.

My step-daughters are anxious to meet their baby sister. They were all hoping for a boy initially but three ultrasounds have confirmed that it’s a girl. They often ask if the baby is moving and will sit beside me with their hands on my belly hoping that she will kick or punch them. I have never really liked my belly but I now find my hands rubbing my belly affectionately and am ok with my family kissing my belly good morning and good night. And it has been a strange transition of dressing to disguise my belly to dressing to show off the fact that I am pregnant.

As New Years approaches my thoughts turn more and more to how and where this baby will arrive. We are hoping to give birth in Canada but there are so many complications and things that could change yet. One thing remains true, no matter where she arrives, she will be loved. A visa application has been submitted with hopes and prayers that her Daddy can be there when she makes her arrival. We would love to be together but whether we are together or miles apart, we will rejoice at the birth of our baby girl.

Pedro and his four girls on Canadian Thanksgiving.